What Would Forrest Do?
What Would Forrest Do?
by Donna on Jul 29, 2011 4:29 PM EDT
in What Would Forrest Do?
Scenario: Crap on a cracker! The debt ceiling expires on August 2nd, and without some Congressional teamwork, the entire world economy could be driven to the brink of collapse!
What Would Forrest Do? Forrest immediately implements the 'Forrest Griffin Three Pronged Approach To Debt Ceiling Kickassery'.
Step 1: Forrest single handedly pays off the defecit with a kissing/sex booth. In an obviously related incident, 15,000 babies are born 9 months later sporting chest hair and goofy ears.
Step 2: Forrest starts a new party, the Griffin party, where those in charge earn the vote by exhibiting extraordinary feats of strength.
Step 3: The Griffin party enacts laws where everything is paid with blood, sweat and tears. No more borrowing necessary.
1 commentWhat Would Forrest Do?
by Donna on Apr 22, 2010 12:15 PM EDT
in What Would Forrest Do?
Scenario: Holy Moly! The Eyjafjallajokull volcano in Iceland is spewing ash into the air, making air travel in Europe impossible!
What Would Forrest Do? Forrest heads off to Iceland and releases a monster testosterone-laden belch that clears the ash away. As a side result, there is a rainbow over Iceland for the next 328 years.
What Would Forrest Do?
by Donna on Jan 28, 2010 8:00 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
What Would Forrest Do?
by Beth on Jan 21, 2010 11:17 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
Scenario: The peaceful Na'vi of Pandora face extinction as the brutal sky people attempt to plunder the planet of its precious resources.
What Would Forrest Do? Forrest infiltrates the Na'vi in a brutal plan to gain their trust and then help the sky people in their attempts to control the planet. After Forrest mates with a beautiful Na'vi, he goes back to the sky people helps them in their quest. Forrest prefers alien chicks with three boobs.
What Would Forrest Do?
by Beth on Jan 14, 2010 9:56 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
Scenario: Sweet Jesus! A feeble old lady has just been run over by a taxi in Times Square. People are standing around taking pictures but no one's helping.
What Would Forrest Do? Forrest runs over to help the feeble old lady. With his right hand he lifts the cab off of her, with his left hand be buys a hot dog from the street vendor. Forrest loves a NY hot dog.
What Would Forrest Do?
by Donna on Jan 7, 2010 9:42 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
Scenario: Oh no! Global Warming is melting the ice, and the poor polar bears can’t get to the seals!
What Would Forrest Do? Forrest’s magical chest hair strikes again! Forrest rips out some of his glorious chest mane and sprinkles it on the melted ice, creating an ice bridge! The polar bears take their new hair highway to the sea, and gorge themselves on delicious seals.
What Would Forrest Do?
by Donna on Dec 31, 2009 8:00 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
What Would Forrest Do?
by Beth on Dec 24, 2009 9:00 AM EST
in What Would Forrest Do?
What Would Forrest Do? - Forrest would shoot first and ask questions later. He runs to his gun cabinet and shoots the hell out of his roof. Unfortunately, all of Santa's reindeer die. Fortunately, Forrest makes a kick ass reindeer sausage.
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