Every morning my day starts with a visit to two sites, Bloody Elbow and MiddleEasy.   Zeus, the main man behind Middle Easy has always been really supportive of our site which earns him two Beth and Donna bosom hugs on the spot.  But he's always been super mysterious as well.  For a long time, I believed he was a self aware computer in a bunker in the Arizona desert.  However, his answers to these questions would have me think differently.  I reserve judgment until we meet at the Fan Expo in Boston.

1.       So, what are you wearing?

I'm wearing a red 'Team Korea' shirt some drunk guy gave me at ESPNZone in downtown LA the night KJ Noons' dad nearly choked me out. Shorts, Hurley sandals and years of childhood resentment.

2.       When you were 10 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A responsible adult so I can watch a rated R movie without my parents telling me to close my eyes when a sex scene would come on.

3.       If you could have any superpower, what would it be?

The power to make any parking attendant immediately explode on contact if they issue a ticket to my vehicle. 

4.       What is the worst way you can think of to have to spend an evening?

Knowing that the following morning, an asteroid will hit earth and make all life on earth extinct and erase all signs of human civilization from the planet. I think that is the absolute worst way to spend an evening.

5.       I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.  What is that?

I've been in love once and the chick sat me down at her parents' house to tell me she was turning lesbian and then offered me some Korean BBQ afterward. It's a little hard to eat BBQ knowing that a chick you loved has elected to go with the same sex over you.

6.       What song is currently playing on your iPod?

Bjork - Declare Independence solely because I'm blown away that DREAM used that song in conjunction with footage of the bombing of Pearl Harbor to cut a promo for Dream 14.

7.       What is your favorite curse word?

 [expletive] 

8.       What is your favorite movie?

Airheads, since it's impossible not to watch when it comes on television.

9.       Do these jeans make my butt look big?

Only in a good way. The best way, of course.

10.   If you could take two weeks off, where would you go?

I would travel back in time exactly one day before I had this hypothetical two weeks off and forever be caught in a time loop of relaxation.

11.   If you could only listen to one band/musician for the rest of your life, who would it be?

Undoubtedly Wu-Tang Clan. They taught me everything I needed to know about everything I needed to know.

12.   Will you be my boyfriend?

I'm a complete nutcase. Have you actually read MiddleEasy? I reference my ex-girlfriends at least once a week.

13.   Do you ever get in touch with your feminine side?  If so, how?

I cross-dress, occasionally. My attempts to get Ben Fowlkes from MMAFighting to hop on the bandwagon have been futile thus far.

14.   Which actor would you want to play you in a movie about your life?

Any cast member off the movie Gummo would do just fine.

15.   Do you dig chicks with tattoos?

I'm covered with them, so of course. I actually dig chicks without tattoos too. My standards include chicks with or without tattoos. 

16.   Would you rather be President of the United States or the lead singer of a rock band?

President of the United States. Apparently it looks better on your resume. 

17.   What was your first job?

Cart cleaner at a golf course. I worked with an older guy named Otis. He would tell me that the world is hollow and inside the planet is an inner-earth filled with giants and large fruit. Otis said the only way you could enter the hollow earth is from the south pole. A few months later, Otis left the golf course to embark on an expedition to the south pole. He left me his old Ford Mustang which I still have parked in my parent's garage to this day. 

18.   You just won $50 million in the lottery.  What’s the first thing you buy?

I would pay Melvin Manhoef the $700 I owe him. Life is not good when you owe a guy with the highest KO ratio in MMA history money. 

19.   What is your worst habit?

Saying the name 'Sexyama' in a Boston accent. Try it, it's ridiculous.

20.   Before you take us to bed or lose us forever, what would you like to say to the ladies who are fans of MMA?

Continue to watch as much MMA as possible and in the words of Dan Quinn 'Ladies, whoever does date me will be rewarded when the scientific community finally wakes up and validates that I actually have the ability to turn water into fuel'.

Amir contemplates whether he is man enough to handle the twins. Yes, Amir. You are man enough. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.

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If you've spent more than 5 minutes reading our site, then you know how much we love Amir Sadollah.  Not just a "Hey, yeah, he's a great fighter" love.  No, it's more of a "Sweet Jesus, I love him so much.  Do you think he loves me too?" adoration that the Gals haven't possessed since the New Kids on the Block adorned every available space on our bedroom walls.  In case you're interested, Donna was a Jordan girl and I was Donnie super freak.

Now who can think of a better person to answer our 20 questions?  I surely can't.  Which is why we are super duper excited that he took time out from his busy (pantydropping) schedule to play our game. And by super duper excited I mean squeals, hugs, tears (Donna's, not mine), and general revelry.  What more can I say?  Actually, I can say quite a bit more.  However, I will spare you all my rambling and get down to business.

1. When you were 10 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?

11. I did not aim high.

2. If you could have any superpower, what would it be?

hmmm... the ability to.... come up... with... snappy answers to.... interview questions.

3. What is the worst way you can think of to have to spend an evening?

Sitting in traffic. Or doing my taxes. Shit what if you were in traffic on the way to do your taxes? Game over, man.

4. Would you rather be the President of the United States or the lead singer of a rock band?

I will aim to do both. Vote Amir in 2012. Because he rocks.

5. Normally we ask if you’d be willing to beat up Donna’s archnemesis, CB Dollaway for us. But since you’ve already done that twice (holla!), tell us, were his tears extra salty?

I would first be interested to hear how that rivalry started.

6. I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that. What is that?

Do her taxes.

7. What is the first thing you check out when you meet a woman? Don’t say personality, it doesn’t count and it would be a lie.

I won't and it would be. Probably long arms. Not like freakishly long, but at least kind of long. My kid's gonna be a striker dang it.

8. What song is currently playing on your iPod?

Meh... Something cool.

9. Do you dig chicks with tattoos?

Sure. Also I like girls with eye patches. Weird, but I needed to get that out.

10. What is your favorite curse word?

I just learned a new one in Dutch. Kut. It's exactly what it sounds like.

11. The Ultimate Fighter house: Monotonous sausage fest or awesome male bonding time?

Definitely a dude ranch, but still fun.

12 What is your favorite movie?

Ghostbusters.

13. Do these jeans make my butt look big?

No, but the bedazzled initials on the butt looks like a balloon you wrote on before you blew it up.

14. What is the first thing you want to eat after cutting weight?

Usually, everything. At once. I continue to make the mistake of trying a pizza, steak, ice cream, and pasta smoothie. Maybe I'll get it right next time.

15. If you could only listen to one band/musician for the rest of your life, who would it be?

Man.... I thought I dodged this subject after the ipod question. Um... Tom Jones?

16. Will you be my boyfriend?

I'll have to ask my girlfriend. She'll probably be down. Or punch me in the mouth. Either way, I get a workout.

17. Do you ever get in touch with your feminine side? If so, how?

My lawyers have advised against any public discussion of that incident.

18. Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life?

Probably Joe Don Baker, from the 70's.

19. Does our complete adoration for you make you uncomfortable?

Nope, because I didn't read this until the end of the interview.

20. Before you take us to bed or lose us forever, what would you like to say to the gals who are fans of MMA?

I would say I appreciate you so much I'm not even going to make a sexist joke here. I think you know a sport has arrived when girls are fans too. :)

Photo courtesy of Sherdog.

Nate Quarry is a busy man.  So busy, in fact, that he only had time to answer 10 of our questions.  But as a Pantydropper of the Week alumni, he could really get away with anything in our eyes.  We're easy that way.

Be sure to keep up with the splendor that is Nate Quarry by checking out his website.  You can also follow his Twitterings @NateRockQuarry.  Funny stuff, we promise.

1. When you were 10 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?

The leader of the Rebel Alliance

2. What is your favorite curse word?

So many to choose from, I love them all. 

3. Would you rather be the lead singer of a rock band or President of the United States?

Lead singer easy. Get all those women and your job involves sitting around drinking? I chose the wrong career.

4. Jersey Shore. Portrays all Italian Americans in a bad light or a rip-roaring good time?

Never watched it. But I generally laugh at people living up to their stereotypes.

5. Do you ever get in touch with your feminine side? If so, how?

Uh... this is embarrassing but I got caught watching "He's Just Not that into You". I just wanted to know if they'd find true love. Is that so wrong?

6. If you could only listen to one musician/band for the rest of your life, who would it be?

Wow, that's a tough one. Because my musical tastes are all over the place. The last two cds I bought were Jay Z's Black Album and Cat Steven's Greatest Hits. I'm usually listening to real chill stuff. Quiets the voices in my head...

7. If you could have any superpower what would it be?

To control time. Make the good times last forever.

8. Will you be my boyfriend?

Can you cook? Requirements to be my girlfriend, be strong, athletic, quick witted, loving, intelligent and be willing to date a closet nerd. 

9. What actor would you like to play you in the movie about your life?

 Hmm... I've actually been thinking about this as, and no one knows this, I just wrote a short story/movie script with aspects of my life as the lead character. But I just can't think of anyone with my dry sense of humor and intensity... suggestions? (I'd say Andre the Giant if he was still with us)

10. Before you take us to bed or lose us forever, what would you like to say to the gals who are fans of MMA? 

You are my favorite demographic :-)

Well if you didn't adore him before reading this, you certainly will after. We've had our eye on Brendan Schaub this season on The Ultimate Fighter. This former football player and Golden Gloves Heavyweight is like a cool breeze on a hot summers day, a patch of flowers on an otherwise barren field, a...oopsy, I just lost myself for a minute there. We definitely see great things in his future. You can stay in touch with what he's up to at his website and follow him on twitter @BrendanSchaub.

1. When you were 10 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?
When I was 10 I wanted to be a Hitman or just like Jean Claude van Damme

2. What was your first job?
My 1st job I was a janitor at Albertsons grocery store it was awful!

3. We are New York Jets fans. Do you hold this against us?
lol Not at all I'm a New York Yankees fan

4. What is the first thing you check out when you meet a woman? Don’t say personality, it doesn’t count and it would be a lie.
First thing I check out is usually the face it starts there and work my way down

5. If you could have any superpower what would it be?
If I could have any super power it would be the ability to fly..I hate traffic

6. If we were to press play on your iPod, what song would be playing?
If u pressed play on my ipod you would hear a Lil Wayne mix tape most likely

7. The Ultimate Fighter house: monotonous sausage fest or awesome male bonding time?
TUF house was both a sausage fest and a lot of male bonding at the same time..I know scary lol

8. What is your favorite curse word?
My fav. curse word is saying awww...shit!

9. Will you be my boyfriend?
ha My girlfriend would kill me if I was your boyfriend..no can do lol

10. What’s the worst way you can think of to have to spend an evening?
Worst way to spend an evening is at a dinner with a bunch of stuck up tools who act like they know what the UFC is, then ask if I ever talk to my boss Vince McMahon (owner of WWE)

11. Which would you rather be: the lead singer of a rock band or President of the United States?
Oh lead singer of a rock band! Being president would be way to stressful, plus I kick ass on rock band!

12. I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that. What is that?
Not sure what he's talking about "he won't do that?", some girl might of asked him to do some weird stuff lol

13. Do these jeans make my butt look big?
I hope so no one likes a flat ass (Beth: GREAT answer! Someone has trained him very well : ) )

14. What actor would you want to play you in the movie about your life?
I would pick the Rock! Dwayne Johnson I love that guy..him for sure lol

15. Do you dig chicks with tattoos?
I love Tattoos when there done right and its good work

16. Donna’s arch-nemesis is CB Dolloway. Would you be willing to beat him up for her?
I would definitely beat up CB Dollaway for her! no problem : ) (Beth: This answer made Donna sigh with contentment. He's so good to us)

17. Do you ever get in touch with your feminine side? If so, how?
I do get in touch with my feminine side I think..I catch myself watching the Tyra Banks show all the time

18. What is your favorite movie?
My fav. movie...tough one there so many but probably Heat or The Departed

19. If you could only listen to one musician/band for the rest of your life, who would it be?
If I could only listen to one it would be Frank Sinatra

20. Before you take us to bed or lose us forever, what would you like to say to the gals who are fans of MMA?
I would say thanks for the support! You ladies are great! Thanks for the love : )

It's time for a (hopefully) regular feature here on Gals Guide to MMA we call 20 Questions. We're going to ask fighters the kinds of questions ladies want the answers to, and we hope you enjoy it. Are you dying to know how his training has been going? You won’t find that here. Are you curious about whom he wants his next opponent to be? You’ll have to go somewhere else for that. Now, if you want to know whether or not Eliot is man enough to cry, read on my friends. If you want to know what superpower Eliot would want to have, you’ve found the right place. Much love and props to Eliot Marshall for taking the time to answer our questions. (He's our first, tee hee).

1. When you were 10 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?
When I was a kid I wanted to be a karate teacher.

2. If we were to press play on your iPod, what song would be playing?
Unfortunately 'Amazing' by Kanye West is playing.

3. What is your favorite curse word?
Fuck.

4. When you're cutting weight, what is the first thing you want to eat after the weigh-in?
I really want my half pedialite half water and oranges.

5. I would do anything for love, but I won't do that. What is that?
Under the right circumstances I would do anything.

6. What is your favorite movie?
Braveheart.

7. What is the worst way you could think of to have to spend an evening?
In the Ultimate Fighter house.

8. Would you rather be President of the United States or the lead singer of a band?
President.

9. We know you have a degree in Math, so here's an important question. Boardwalk: a waste of monopoly money or a wise investment?
Wise investment, somebody is bound to land on it.

10. If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
Teleportation.

11. Do you ever get in touch with your feminine side? If so, how?
Sometimes in the middle of training camp after a really hard day of
training I will cry for no reason.

12. What actor would you want to play you in the movie about your life?
Rampage.

13. What would the title of that movie be?
It's All About E.

14. Do you dig chicks with tattoos?
I don't discriminate.

15. Will you be my boyfriend?
Ya, sorry I'm already taken.

16. Is your wife jealous of our relationship?
She isn't the jealous type.

17. If you could only listen to one band/singer for the rest of your life, who would it be?
Jay-z.

18. Who would win in a fight between Jean-Claude van Damme and Steven Segal?
Simultaneous KO, they're both pussies.

19. Donna's archnemesis is CB Dollaway. Would you be willing to beat him up for us?
He is a middleweight, sorry.

20. Before you take us to bed or lose us forever, what would you like to say to the gals who are fans of MMA?
Thanks for the support and keep on bringing your men to fights.