The first episode of TUF Heavyweights started with a bang, with Evans and Jackson having a war of words while waiting for the fighters to arrive. Can't help but feel let down that all of the tension will not be handled with an end of season fight. Kind of like an ice cream sundae with no cherry on top. (Beth: or a massage with no happy ending).

The guys walk in, and they are as big as houses. Rampage and Evans look like little children next to these bohemeths. When Dana walks in, he points out that there are only 15 fighters, and that the 16th guy is someone he's talked a lot of shit about, so they're going to bring him in and see if he can actually fight. Rampage says, "Who is it? Tank Abbott?" Hilarious. When Kimbo walks in, everyone but Jackson is let down. Rampage is obviously a superfan, but the other guys couldn't give a shit. (Beth: I've always been a Jackson fan, but now I can't help but dislike him a little for doing the dumbass movie.)

The fighters train for 2 hours, and Ramage says multiple times that he wants Kimbo, while Evans clearly wants no part of him. (Beth: I really hope that this season doesn't turn into The Ultimate Kimbo). There is an interesting group of guys this year, including 4 former NFL players, 3 former UFC fighters, and 1 IFL champion. Jackson humilates a guy by assigning him the nickname "Titties". As usual, Dana flips a coin to see who has first pick. This year they can either chose the first fighter or the first two fights. Evans wins the coin toss and chooses the first fighter. The coaches, without fail, always choose the first fighter, but this tends to bite them in the ass as the person who controls the fights controls the game. Nothing too surprising here. Jackson picks Kimbo first, Evans takes his two teammates, and they go down the line. Truly inspired was a cutaway to Wes Sims, who felt the need to tell us he beat Frank Mir twice, while also referring to himself in the third person not one, but two times. I'm not going to like this guy.

Back at the house, Kimbo calls dabs on a bed. We're pretty sure he meant dibs. The guys are already talking about wanting to take out Kimbo. Most seem to believe he doesn't belong there. We agree. (Beth: I know I shouldn't, but I really want to see Kimbo fail miserably).

The first fight is going to be between John Madsen and Abe Wagner. Abe is considerably bigger than John, and as Rampage tells us multiple times, size does matter. Team Evans decides that John should focus on his wrestling, as Abe has no ground game. Team Jackson decides Abe should work on his BJJ and striking, as he has fists the size of hams. We can already see where this fight is going.

John channels Brock Lesnar and practices classic lay and pray fighting. Steve Mazzagati stands them up quite a few times, and each time John takes Abe down. You'd think at some point Abe would catch on to John's game plan, but this doesn't happen. (Beth: Wagner seemed unable or unwilling to take direction from the coaches). Neither fighter seems to be listening to their coaching team, and towards the end of the second round Rampage gets so pissed at Abe that he leaves. John wins the fight, and Abe has a cut on his forehead that is down to the bone. (Beth: It was truly horrific! I couldn't look away).